Nayad Monroe (nayad) wrote,
Nayad Monroe

All over the place, all inside my head

This month is wearing me out. I have warring emotional states encamped in my mind, I have confused friends who are confusing me, I have a new schedule, and I have a lingering cough that has been here since the end of August (James has had a similar one for the same amount of time).

If the emotional states were all dark and gloomy, I would simply turn inward, sleep a lot, and make a point of taking a few extra candlelit bubblebaths, and would be restored. It's the trips from the underground caves to the sunny treetops and back again that are so exhausting, though, and exhilarating, and I can see why a bipolar person might not want to pay the price of losing the highs to get rid of the lows, but at the same time, I'm spending a lot of energy on climbing up and down.

I think I would like to go for coffee with a medeine sometime to discuss these things, because all the medeines I know seem to understand the kind of complexities I'm talking about, on an intuitive level. I would gladly seek the insight of a nicolle, too, but I think I need an in-person chat soon-ish, and I haven't booked a flight to Seattle yet.

Two weeks left 'til my trip to Context SF! I'm enthusiastic about going, but this will be my first completely solo trip anywhere (no baby with me, no one I know on the other end), so I'm a bit anxious about how I'll feel while I'm there. There are a few authors I've at least emailed with a bit who will be there, but they'll be busy, and I'll have to work my social skills and meet other people, too.
Tags: meh

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